The Working Theory
“So, you’re telling me,” James ranted in disbelief, “that you fell asleep in your apartment in Boston and just woke up in a hotel halfway around the world?”
“I don’t believe it either,” Sam admitted. “But I don’t know how else to describe it.”
“And this is the first time something like this has happened to you?”
“I’m not sure.”
“What do you mean, you’re not sure? How could you possibly not be sure? If I go to bed in one place and wake up somewhere else, I’m pretty sure I would notice!”
“Well, you remember on Monday when I kind of disappeared from the office?”
“You’re telling me you fell through some magic portal in your office and landed in Singapore or something?”
“No,” Sam scoffed. “That’s just ridiculous. There’s no such thing as magic portals.”
“Then what happened?”
“I don’t know for sure. All I know is that I was at my desk in my office, feeling really dozy, and the next thing I knew, I woke up in my bed at home, still fully dressed.” Sam felt like he should be more panicked than he was. Even though he had no clue why this was all really happening, he knew it wasn’t all in his head and that was deeply comforting to him. He wasn’t crazy. As long as my brain’s not misfiring and James sticks with me, I can figure this all out… somehow.
“And you think the same thing happened to you the other night, too?”
“I don’t know, maybe.”
“But why? I mean, even if you overlook the insanely weird part about getting from one place to another in your sleep, why Bratislava, of all places?” James asked.
“That’s the one thing I do have a hunch about,” Sam stated tentatively. “See, when I fell asleep at my desk, I was thinking about how nice it would be to come home that night, especially since I had been gone for several days previously. And last night when I went to sleep, in the hotel in Bratislava, all I could think about was waking up back in my own bed.”
“Okay,” James reluctantly conceded, “but that doesn’t explain how you got to Bratislava in the first place.”
“Actually, it kind of does.” His nerves tingled slightly as he contemplated his theory.
“How so?”
“You remember that girl, Liz, I told you about?”
“The blonde you met at the office?”
“Yep, that’s the one. Well, it’s possible,” Sam said, avoiding direct eye contact, “that I was thinking about her a little before I fell asleep the night before last.”
“What does that have to do with… oh, wait, let me guess–she’s Slovakian?”
“Good guess.”
“So, you’re telling me that whatever you’re thinking about when you go to sleep, you are mystically transported there once you finally conk out?”
“Sounds crazy, doesn’t it?”
“You bet it does.”
“Do you think I need to go see a shrink or something?”
“Normally I’d say yes, but you didn’t just imagine going to Slovakia. You were actually there. You called me from there. The hotel has a record of you being there. I don’t know what you need, but it’s not a shrink.”
“Well, that’s a relief. I think.”
“Tell you what,” James proposed. “You get yourself cleaned up and ready to go. Then the two of us will go grab a coffee and figure this thing out.”
“Sounds good to me.”
* * *
Sam had spent the entire previous day trying to figure out the riddle of what was happening to him, so it didn’t surprise him they weren’t able to solve it over a single cappuccino. Once their mugs were fully drained, the pair moved on to their office building and reconvened the discussion around Sam’s desk.
“I feel like we’re just going in circles,” Sam stated, furrowing his brow in frustration. “We’re trying to make sense out of something that doesn’t make any sense!”
“Maybe you’re right,” James said. “Perhaps we should take a break from all this and try to get some work done. As long as you don’t nod off at your desk again, everything should be normal until tonight anyway, right?”
Sam shrugged his shoulders. “Sure, I guess.”
“Right. So, we’ll let the ideas percolate in the old subconscious for a while and see what we can come up with after office hours.” The two friends agreed on the plan, both knowing that the subject would not stay relegated to the back of their minds for very long, if at all.
“Good Morning, Sam,” a cheery voice stirred him from his thoughts.
“Oh, hey Kyle. How’s it going?”
“Not bad,” the receptionist said from the office doorway. “You have a visitor.”
“That’s strange. I don’t have any appointments scheduled this morning.”
“I think you’ll want to take this one,” Kyle grinned slyly. “She’s pretty cute and James told me you’ve got a bit of a thing for her.”
“Liz?” Sam tried desperately, albeit poorly, to conceal his delight. “I suppose I can carve out a few moments. Send her in.”
“You’ve got it, Sam.”
Moments later, Liz walked into Sam’s office, gazing around in curiosity. “So, this is where you hide out all day.”
“Yeah, I guess so.”
“Hmm. I looked for you yesterday, but you were nowhere to be found and no one seemed to know where you had gone off to.”
“Come on in and have a seat,” Sam offered. “Yeah, yesterday was kind of a crazy day for me.” He paused for a moment, nervously trying to decide how forward he should be. He attempted to sound casual despite his racing heart. “It’s nice to know I was missed.”
“Well, you’re pretty much the only person I know here.”
“Lucky me,” Sam grinned. “What are you up to today?”
“My boss is upstairs again, so I have some time to kill.”
“Do you think you will be here regularly?”
“No, not after today.”
“That’s unfortunate. I kind of enjoy running into you in the building.” He could feel his breathing speed up noticeably as the words left his lips.
After what felt like an eternity to Sam, Liz replied. “Well, nothing says we can’t run into each other after office hours.”
“That sounds nice.”
“Anyway, I don’t want to keep you from your work. I just thought I should check on you and make sure you were okay since you were mysteriously AWOL yesterday. I know it sounds corny, but I was worried something had happened to you.”
Sam considered all that had happened in the last 36 hours. He was not a convincing liar, but he gave it his best shot. “Nope, nothing terribly interesting. Just the same old, same old.”
Liz looked at him for a moment. “Uh-ha.” His answer had obviously not persuaded her, but she seemed certain whether she should press further. “Alright, I guess I’ll have to take your word for it.”
“I appreciate it.” Sam sighed in relief at not having to lie further, or worse yet, explain what had actually happened.
“Well, just in case you disappear again before the end of the day, have a great weekend.”
“Thanks. You too.” Sam knew he was smiling more than he should have, but he couldn’t stop.
“Okay. Well, you have my number if you feel like crossing paths some time.”
“Yes. Yes, I do.”
“Great. Bye for now, Sam.”
“Yeah, see you soon!” he called out as she headed to the door. Very soon, I hope.
* * *
“Welcome!” an attractive woman with shoulder-length brunette hair greeted. “Nice to see you, Sam.”
Sam had spent the afternoon out of the office taking a deposition from a new client, which had left no opportunity for him and James to discuss his predicament further. It wouldn’t have been much of a conversation anyway, as neither of them had any brilliant solution to his bizarre sleeping disorder. James had invited him to come over to his house and eat the left-over ribs from the previous night and chat some more.
“Thanks for inviting me, Cindy. Again.” Sam said, entering the house. “I’m sorry about last night.”
“Don’t worry about it. My hubby says you had a legitimate excuse, although he won’t tell me what it actually was.” She paused, giving Sam a chance to offer an explanation of his own. When it was clear no such information would be forthcoming, she got an excited twinkle in her eye. “Who cares about that, anyway? James tells me you’ve met a girl!”
“Hmm, James seems to be saying a lot of things these days.”
“I learned a long time ago there was no point trying to keep secrets from this woman,” James chuckled.
“Smart man!” Cindy laughed and gave him an affectionate peck on the cheek. “Supper will be ready soon and then you can tell me all about your new flame,” she said and then retreated to the kitchen.
“Great,” Sam said, rolling his eyes. “Thanks a lot for telling her about Liz,” he said in fake protest. “Having your wife play matchmaker is the last thing I need right now.”
“Hey, what are friends for?”
“Right. But in all seriousness, thanks for not telling her about the other thing.”
“I have to admit, it was mostly just a lack of opportunity more than anything,” James confessed. “That and I didn’t know how to tell her about your little problem without sounding like a complete nutbar.”
“Do you think she’d notice the difference?” Sam laughed.
“Probably not.” James appeared to weigh his next words and then continued, “Actually, I think it might not be a bad idea to bring her in on all this. After all, neither one of us has any clue what to do about it. Maybe she’ll think of something we haven’t.”
“I guess.”
About halfway through the meal, James offered a less than subtle segue into the conversation and waited to see if Sam would bite. He did, reluctantly at first, and explained to Cindy what had been happening to him since he had returned from Denver. He wasn’t surprised that she thought they were just messing with her at first. However, once she selected the number on their phone from the two nights ago, hit redial, and talked to the lady at the front desk of the Park Inn, she took things more seriously.
“So, you’re telling me you were actually in Slovakia last night?”
“Yeah, that’s what I’m saying.”
“How… how is that possible?”
“No clue.”
“That’s what we’re trying to figure out, babe,” James said, feeding their daughter, Sophie, the last spoonful of applesauce.
“That just doesn’t make any sense,” Cindy said.
“I agree, but it happened,” Sam stated.
“The question is, how do you keep it from happening again?” James pondered aloud.
“And you think that where you end up is based on the last thought you have before you fall asleep?” Cindy inquired thoughtfully.
“That’s the working theory.”
“So as long as you make sure you only think about being in your apartment, you should be fine.”
“I guess. Unless my mind wanders.”
“Are you sure that’s how it works?” Cindy asked again.
“What are you thinking, sweetheart?”
“I don’t know. I think maybe we should make sure that’s how it all works. After all, if where you wake up is based on something other than your last thought, then thinking about your apartment won’t actually do any good.”
“I suppose, but how do you suggest I test the theory?”
“There’s really only one way,” Cindy said. “So far, you have just been guessing why you’ve ended up where you did. What if you intentionally try to go someplace? Someplace other than your own bed.”
“That’s not a bad idea. If I intentionally focus on someplace, particularly someplace I wouldn’t normally be thinking about, we could see if I actually end up there or just some other random place.”
“Better pick somewhere nice,” his friend said.
“Yeah, and I’m going to be fully dressed and have my wallet with me this time!”
“Oh man,” James roared with laughter. “Just make sure you never fall asleep while taking a bath. That would be awkward!”
“Yep, that settles it–I’m never taking a bath again.”
“Guys are so weird,” Cindy laughed. After the laughter died down, she asked, “So, where are you headed?”
“I don’t know. I hear Hawaii is nice this time of year.”
“Dude, Hawaii is nice any time of year.”
“Good point,” Sam conceded. “I’ve never been, so maybe this is my chance.”
“Do you think you’ll wake up in a hotel again?”
“I don’t know. I sure hope so, although I can’t for the life of me figure out how that part of it works.”
“Is there any part of this you can figure out?” James grinned.
“Nope, not really.”
“You’re welcome to sleep on our couch if you like,” Cindy offered.
“Thanks, but I think I’ll be okay. After all, what’s the worst that can happen? Either I wake up in my own bed tomorrow morning or I wake up in Maui.”
“Or you wake up in Siberia,” James said.
“Great, thanks for putting that idea in my head.”
Sam stayed at James and Cindy’s house for a while longer and then called an Uber to take him home. After securely locking his apartment door, he turned on an Iz CD and laid down in his bed. Based on a suggestion Cindy had made, he packed a small bag with some extra clothes and toiletries. He wasn’t sure if the bag would travel with him, but it would be valuable information to know either way. Sam realized it was essential for him to understand what was happening to him and why if he were to have any hope of controlling it.
* * *
The early morning sun shone in the window. Even before he opened his eyes, Sam knew he was no longer in his own apartment. He could smell the fresh ocean air and the scent of tropical plants. He sat up in bed and glanced around at the unmistakable island vibe of the room’s décor. The walls were painted pastel yellow and teal, and the large patio doors led out to a small balcony overlooking the beach. Much like he had done after arriving in Bratislava, Sam began rifling through the drawers for some indication of exactly where he was. It did not take long to find the Guest Information book for the Waikiki Circle Hotel.
If he remembered his 6th-grade geography correctly, Waikiki was on Oahu, not Maui. All things considered, I think it’s safe to say that the prevailing theory of why I travel to the places I do holds water. After taking a few minutes to soak up the sun and fresh air on the balcony, Sam stepped back inside the room and examined the bed he had woken up in. He quickly found the small bag he had packed the night before partially tucked under a pillow. This was bound to be a considerably more enjoyable couple of days compared to his time at the Park Inn.
Sam fished his cell phone out of his pocket and dialed James’ number. After a couple of rings, a familiar voice answered. “Hey Cindy, it’s me.”
“Where are you, Sam?” she asked.
“Would you believe Hawaii?”
“No. Way.”
“Yes, way.”
“James, he’s there! He’s actually there!” she called out. “Hang on a second, Sam. I’m going to put you on speaker.”
“What’s up, Sam?” James greeted.
“Judging by the view from my hotel room balcony, I’d say surf’s up!”
“Unreal, man. Totally unreal.”
“Tell me about it.”
“What are you going to do now?” Cindy asked.
“I guess I’ll grab a bite to eat, check out the beach, maybe tour around the island a bit.”
“Nice,” James said, with a hint of envy. “Just make sure you pay attention to what you’re thinking about when you fall asleep tonight.”
“Yes, and be sure to think about home on Sunday night,” she said.
“You got it. I guess I’ll see you guys on Monday.”
“Enjoy your vacation!”
Sam hung up the phone and considered what to do next. After taking a quick shower, he headed downstairs for breakfast. As he sat sipping the last of his coffee, he pulled out the page he had ripped off the small notepad in his room. After reading the phone number in the header, he pulled out his cell phone and dialed.
“Good morning,” a chipper voice greeted. “Thank you for calling the Waikiki Circle Hotel. How may I help you?”
“Yes, I was wondering if you had a guest registered there by the name of Sam Bishop.”
“One moment, please.” Sam waited nervously for a minute. “Yes, sir, we do. Would you like me to connect you to his room?”
“No thanks. I doubt he’s in right now, anyway. Thanks.”
“No problem, sir. Have a great day.”
“Thanks. You too.”
Guess that means it’s safe to go back to the room, Sam thought. He felt enormously relieved to know, or at least feel pretty sure, that his last waking thought set his destination. That knowledge made him feel like he had gained at least some measure of control over his life. It felt quite comforting to at least have one of his thousand and one questions answered. He spent several minutes draining his freshly refilled mug and trying to decipher how his room had been reserved. Eventually, his coffee was gone and an old adage about a gift horse’s mouth convinced him to let it go and just enjoy his surroundings.
After extending his hotel reservation for a second night, Sam bought a ticket for a bus tour to see some of the more scenic points on the island, the highlight of which was the stop at the Pearl Harbor Memorial site. That evening, he attended an authentic Hawaiian luau, complete with a full roasted pig and traditional Polynesian dancers. He returned to his hotel room Saturday night, having put on more than a few miles during the day, and ready for a good night’s sleep. As he lay in bed, he attempted to focus his mind on the surrounding room. If their theory held true, as long as his mind didn’t wander, he should wake up in the same bed he fell asleep in.
Sunday morning arrived and Sam was delighted to find himself still in his same room at the Waikiki Circle Hotel. With his legs slightly lethargic from all the walking he had done the previous day, Sam spent most of his time relaxing on the beach and soaking up as much of the tropical sun as he could. As the sun set, he found a quaint little restaurant and eventually convinced himself to try the local delicacy of deep-fried Spam.
The ocean breeze wafted over him as he headed back to the hotel after supper. Sam couldn’t help but smile as he considered the last 48 hours. The experience had been surreal, to say the least, but it had also been a wonderful escape from the hectic pace he had been attempting to keep for the past few months. An escape he had desperately needed, perhaps even more than he had realized.
When he arrived back at his room, Sam packed up his bag again and laid down on the bed. He did his best to fight off any distractions and think of nothing other than his apartment back in Boston. Unfortunately, intently focusing his mind on that thought made it very difficult for him to drift off to sleep. After midnight, Sam’s eyes got heavier and heavier until he finally nodded off.
​
* * *
“Where have you been?” James demanded.
“You mean other than Hawaii?” Sam asked as he walked into his office.
“I mean this morning!”
“What do you mean? Work doesn’t officially start for another seven minutes. Where’s the fire?”
“Have you forgotten all about the memo?”
“What memo? I have no clue what you’re talking about.”
“The memo we got on Friday afternoon!” James was on the verge of panic.
“Dude, I wasn’t even here on Friday afternoon,” Sam said.
“Here.” James grabbed a piece of paper off the desk and held it in front of his friend. “Read.”
As he read the brief memo, Sam’s face dropped. “Why didn’t you tell me about this?!”
“I was going to tell you when you came over to my place on Friday night, but then we got to talking about the other thing and it slipped my mind–until last night when I lay awake worrying about it.”
“Why didn’t you call me?”
“I did! Like a hundred times. You never answered. Not last night. Not this morning. Not ever.”
“What do you mean I… oh, that’s right.” Sam pulled his phone out of his pocket and turned it on. “Twenty-two missed calls and seventeen text messages,” he reported. “If I had known, I wouldn’t have traipsed off to Waikiki for the weekend.”
“Why not? You might as well have a good time before you get fired,” James quipped.
“You don’t know for sure that we’re getting fired.”
“Sam, seriously, why else does someone get called up to the 25th? Have you ever met anyone who’s gone up there and not got fired?”
“There has to be a first time, right?” Sam asked weakly.
“Hey, guys,” Kyle said gently. “I’m really sorry, but I just got the call and they are ready for you upstairs.”
“This is it.”
“Come on, James. Time to go face the music.”
“Good luck, guys.” The pair exited Sam’s office, headed toward the elevators, and stepped inside. “You’re gonna need it,” Kyle said in a voice he had probably intended to be too soft for them to hear.
